A big-shot attorney ended up in the hospital for a few days, and from the very beginning, he was a nightmare for the staff.
He treated the nurses like his personal assistants, barking orders and complaining about everything imaginable.
No one on the staff could stand him. But the head nurse? She was the only one brave enough—and smart enough—to put him in his place.
One day, she walked into his room with a determined look. “I need to take your temperature,” she said firmly.
The attorney immediately started grumbling and whining—five full minutes of dramatic complaining—before finally crossing his arms, opening his mouth, and reluctantly giving in.
“No, sorry,” the nurse said calmly, “I can’t use an oral thermometer for this reading.”
More complaints followed, but after a moment, he rolled over, exposing his backside with a sigh that could have been heard down the hall.
Once the thermometer was in place, the nurse smirked. “I need to get something. Stay JUST LIKE THAT until I get back!”
She left, intentionally leaving the door wide open.
The attorney’s face turned bright red as hospital staff and visitors passed by, chuckling at his predicament.
Twenty minutes later, the doctor walked in, looking around in confusion. “What’s going on here?” he asked.
The attorney, still embarrassed, snapped, “What’s the matter, Doc? Never seen anyone get their temperature taken?”
The doctor paused, deadpan, and replied, “Not with a Daffodil.”
The attorney froze. “A… what?!”
The doctor just shrugged and walked out, leaving the attorney fuming and the nurse quietly smirking.
The nurse had really outdone herself this time.
LOL!!
An 85-year-old man was driving down the highway when he suddenly saw flashing lights in his rearview mirror. A police officer was pulling him over!
The old man sighed and muttered, “Not again…” But instead of stopping, he hit the gas.
He sped up: 70 mph… 80 mph… then 90 mph!
The police siren blared even louder, and the officer shouted through the speaker, “PULL OVER NOW!”
The old man sighed once more and thought, What am I doing? I’m too old for this nonsense. So he finally pulled over.
The officer approached his window, shaking his head. “Sir, what on earth were you thinking? You were speeding AND trying to outrun the police! This is serious.”
The old man gave a tired smile and said, “Officer, let me explain. Thirty years ago, my wife ran off with a cop. When I saw your lights, I thought you were bringing her back.”
The officer burst out laughing.
After wiping away his tears, the officer said, “Alright, sir. Just drive safe, and have a good day.”
And with that, he let him go.
LOL!!